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Wednesday, April 10, 2013

I have a comedian on my hands.



After I picked the kids up from school yesterday we had to run some errands. Loads of fun. I always kick myself and swear I am NEV-UH (said with a heavy southern drawl) dragging them along with me again. But then my A.D.D. kicks in and .... oh look, something shiny! *Gasp* And look at that lady walking that itty, bitty dog!
So there we were at TJMaxx, all three kids, ...... and can I just interject something here - there is something about that store that puts that crazy in my kids. I'm not sure what it is. Maybe it's the sheer plethora of items they have, it's not like other stores. You never know what you'll find. It's like a treasure hunt.
We had found some good stuff on this trip, and The Boy was already in a particularly good mood anyway. We got to the checkout and the kiddos sat down on the little bench there at the front while the cashier rang up our finds.
Cashier: You have a beautiful family.
Me: Thank you ve- (I didn't get to finish because The Boy interrupts)
The Boy: We're nothing but trouble!
Cashier: *giggles* He's so cute.
Me: Yea, you have no idea.

She continues ringing us up as The Boy strolls over.
The Boy: Look, I'm not going to blame you that you didn't recognize us..... (leans in close and whispers) We're in disguise!

Kill me now! After that she just eyed us suspiciously, like she was wondering "Are they celebrities, or mass murderers?"

I really like TJMaxx, it's a shame I can't go back there.

Monday, April 8, 2013

There's No Arguing With That Kind of Logic


Jon woke up this morning with a perfectly round blue ink imprint on his cheek and on the back of his hand. When he stumbled to the table for breakfast I asked him about it.
Me: What’s with the tattoo?
Him:  Hhhmmmppphhhh???
Me: The blue circle on your cheek.
Him: (blank stare)
Me: It’s a different look. I would have gone for an eagle, or maybe a dolphin, but a circle is good. It’s definitely different.
Him: (stomping off to the bathroom to have a look. After a few seconds he stomps back into the kitchen, an angry face adorns his face) WHO WROTE ON MY FACE???
(Everyone looks at him like he’s grown a second or possibly a third nose.)
Me: Jon, no one has written on your face.
Him: Oh, SOMEONE has!
Me: Come with me and we’ll get it off. (Off we go to bathroom where I work on his cheek with some of my facial cleanser, that’s when I notice the same perfect blue circle on his hand. I point it out to him.) Look, JJ, there’s another of those blue circles. (He looks at his hand.)
Him: WHO IS DOING THIS TO ME???? (This must be how people feel when aliens abduct them; I’d better try to explain it to him)
Me: Obviously you slept on something last night and it transferred onto your skin.
Him: Uh no! The only thing I slept on last night is my bed!