Forget about the other blog!

Holy smokes, I gotta stop getting on the computer after taking Ambien!
Ok, so last night apparently I took my night time meds, then decided it was good time to catch up on my blog, only I couldn't log into my blog. So I guess I created a new one. Ugh.
So, don't bother with that one.
So embarrassing.
This is basically what I wrote just to catch you up:

Okay, so I have been trying to pinch pennies here and there, every little bit helps. So I am still using my "homemade" laundry detergent. I am very pleased with it, I am still on my first batch and can probably make another 2 batches from the supplies I bought. It smells great and cleans great. My supplies cost me:
Large box Purex: $4.99
Large box Borax: 3.99
Large box Arm and Hammer Baking Soda: 2.99
Large container Purex Crystals 4.99 (this is optional but I love they way they smell)
Total cost (rounded up):$14
I have used this for a month now and am still on the first batch. I only use about a tablespoon per load (yes, I have a He washer).
I do several loads a day since there are 5 of us in this house.
I have also made "homemade dish detergent" with the borax and it works great. (with borax, washing soda, and salt)
Before I was spending at least $30 to $40 a month on Tide or Cheer and Downy. Now I am spending $14 for those supplies that will last me about 3 months- that equals out to 4.67 a month.

I can tell you this is making a huge difference at our house. I have also switched to using a multipurpose cleaner using a dawn/vinegar mixture.
These simple cleaners can be used for cleaning floors as well: some dawn, baking soda, mix well, then drop in a little bit of vinegar to get a reaction with the soda. Mix well with mop and clean.
Try these things if you are trying to find new ways to help pinch pennies that won't put a damper on your lifestyle and get pack to me, let me know how they work for you!

Legoland, seriously- this place rocked.

First off, let me just say when we went I was sick as a dog.
I spent the first 2 hours just looking for a safe placing to vomit. Seriously. I mean, I was glancing this way and that way and thinking "Oh, there's a nice bush that I can puke into. I wonder how many people will notice?"
It was horrible.
My mom was awesome, she always is.
And Legoland is overwhelming. It really is. There is so much to see that one day just isn't enough and I felt really, really bad that I was sick and missing out on it.
I mean just look:

That's the Statue of Liberty right there, folks. Made entirely of legos. And I'm pretty sure if you vomit on lego-liberty you go straight to jail. I wasn't chancing it.

You see this beauty? Bok Tower in all it's glory! Lego-Bok!!!! For everyone not from Lake Wales, Bok Tower is like the Statue of Liberty of the South. It's not your fault that you aren't as awesome as us, and we'll try to overlook the fact that we have an awesome singing tower and you don't.  Notice the teeny-tiny people in the background in comparison to these huge lego-made buildings, it's really amazing.



Okay, now only all the Star Wars stuff:

In that last one, I'm pretty sure that KK thought she was posing with Gene Simmons, I mean- just look at her.





They even had a safari:

 After we saw some of the lego exhibits the kids wanted to go to the water park, so we let them play on the water-slides and wave pool, I found a nice table by the snack bar, put my head on the nice cold table and while my mom watched the kiddos I took myself a nap. When I woke up I was fine. My migraine was gone, my nausea was gone, it was a miracle.
So game-on.
For the rest of day the kids and I rode the rides (and they have some crazy roller coasters and we rode them all), played games, got our faces painted, and had a ball.

All in all it was a blast. Legoland was definitely a MUST-GO-SEE!!!!!!

It's been forever, I'm sorry.

I haven't written, you've missed me I can tell.
I've been enjoying summer. My kids and I are living it up. You can't fault me for that.
There's a lot to catch up on.
But not now.
Later. I promise.

I have a comedian on my hands.

After I picked the kids up from school yesterday we had to run some errands. Loads of fun. I always kick myself and swear I am NEV-UH (said with a heavy southern drawl) dragging them along with me again. But then my A.D.D. kicks in and .... oh look, something shiny! *Gasp* And look at that lady walking that itty, bitty dog!
So there we were at TJMaxx, all three kids, ...... and can I just interject something here - there is something about that store that puts that crazy in my kids. I'm not sure what it is. Maybe it's the sheer plethora of items they have, it's not like other stores. You never know what you'll find. It's like a treasure hunt.
We had found some good stuff on this trip, and The Boy was already in a particularly good mood anyway. We got to the checkout and the kiddos sat down on the little bench there at the front while the cashier rang up our finds.
Cashier: You have a beautiful family.
Me: Thank you ve- (I didn't get to finish because The Boy interrupts)
The Boy: We're nothing but trouble!
Cashier: *giggles* He's so cute.
Me: Yea, you have no idea.

She continues ringing us up as The Boy strolls over.
The Boy: Look, I'm not going to blame you that you didn't recognize us..... (leans in close and whispers) We're in disguise!

Kill me now! After that she just eyed us suspiciously, like she was wondering "Are they celebrities, or mass murderers?"

I really like TJMaxx, it's a shame I can't go back there.

There's No Arguing With That Kind of Logic

Jon woke up this morning with a perfectly round blue ink imprint on his cheek and on the back of his hand. When he stumbled to the table for breakfast I asked him about it.

Me: What’s with the tattoo?

Him:  Hhhmmmppphhhh???

Me: The blue circle on your cheek.

Him: (blank stare)

Me: It’s a different look. I would have gone for an eagle, or maybe a dolphin, but a circle is good. It’s definitely different.

Him: (stomping off to the bathroom to have a look. After a few seconds he stomps back into the kitchen, an angry face adorns his face) WHO WROTE ON MY FACE???

(Everyone looks at him like he’s grown a second or possibly a third nose.)

Me: Jon, no one has written on your face.

Him: Oh, SOMEONE has!

Me: Come with me and we’ll get it off. (Off we go to bathroom where I work on his cheek with some of my facial cleanser, that’s when I notice the same perfect blue circle on his hand. I point it out to him.) Look, JJ, there’s another of those blue circles. (He looks at his hand.)

Him: WHO IS DOING THIS TO ME???? (This must be how people feel when aliens abduct them; I’d better try to explain it to him)

Me: Obviously you slept on something last night and it transferred onto your skin.

Him: Uh no! The only thing I slept on last night is my bed!

Just another trip to Target

I had to go Target (my favorite store) to get a phone cord so we could watch Breaking Dawn Part II. Direct TV won’t let us just order the movies anymore for some reason, we have to have a phone cord attached, I really hate it.  We can wait for the movie to download, but it takes F-O-R-E-V-E-R!!!!

So off I went to Target, only guess what??? Target doesn’t carry phone cords. Seems like they just aren’t in high demand any more. Hmmmm.

I picked up a few other items and headed to the checkout.

The following is the conversation I had with the clerk:

Clerk: Did you find everything you were looking for today?

Me: No, I didn’t. I’m afraid I’m going to have to break up with you.

Clerk: (blank stare)

Me: I mean we can still be friends and all, I’m just not gonna get that Target tattoo that I was planning on getting.

Clerk: (crickets chirping)

Me: It’s not you…..it’s me. No, wait. Scratch that. It is you, it’s totally you. After all, y’all are the store, I mean you’re supposed to have the stuff that I want. And when you don’t it sucks.

Clerk: (rapid eye blinking)

Me: Don’t get me wrong. I love you guys. Target rocks. I love you like I love puffy unicorn stickers. Seriously.

Clerk: Well….I…you know…..so…..um…….

Me: You wanna exchange phone numbers so we can talk about it later?

Clerk: (weird, freaked-out smile)

Me: No? Well, okay then, have a great day!

And off I went in search of a phone cord (HEB had one, go figure!)

I had visitors this morning!

When my kiddos opened our front door this morning to see if it was hot or cold (something they do every morning, this is how they decide what to wear) they were greeted by two great big hairy toothy smelly smiles. Seriously. Two big black Great Pyrenees dogs were there at our door. They were super friendly, super smelly, both had on collars with tracking devices, and both were set on staying.
Hmmmmm..... what to do????
I checked the tags. I didn't recognize the street address but that's nothing new, I don't know most of the streets in the neighborhood. So I called the number. No answer. I left a message, something like "Hey there, my name is Lisa Matthews, I'm over on Glade Street, 1215 to be exact and I have 2 super friendly dogs that want to come back home to you. Call me back, or swing by."
Well, I had to run the kiddos to school so what do I do with the dogs?
I couldn't put them in the back yard with Achilles. So I figured I would put them in the kiddos bathroom for now. I just needed to put the cats away first. But when I opened the front door, Calvin was there wanting to go out.
Calving sees the dogs.
The dogs see Calvin.
Calvin runs back through the house.
The dogs give chase.
Chairs get knocked over.
Sofas get jumped.
Blinds get climbed.
Lamps get broken.
But all ended well.
They weren't "KILL! KILL! KILL!" It was more of a "Oooo! Fun! Something to chase!" Once they had Calvin cornered they stopped, it was like "Well, that was fun, what's next?" Even though they had an opportunity to rip him to shreds.
So I ended up putting them in the garage. I know, I should have put them there in the first place. Don't judge me!
I ran the kids to school. Then looked up the dogs' address in my iPhone and off we went on a walk. It was quite a trek, but we made it.
I rang the doorbell.
And rang the doorbell.
And rang the doorbell.
There was two cars there. But no one was answering the door.
Crud.
So, I checked the fence, I couldn't see where they got out. I opened the gate and put them back in. I waited a bit. They seemed happy. I set off for my house. I called the owners again, "Hello, it's Lisa Matthews again. I walked the dogs back home and rang the doorbell but it doesn't seem anyone is home. I put the dogs in the backyard. I didn't see any breech. I hope they stay there. Bye."
I walked home, turning down this street and that street, until finally I turned onto Glade Street. I felt like I was being followed.
I turned around.
There they were.
They looked so guilty.
Both of them immediately laid down, head on their paws. I sat down on the curb, trying to decide what to do. There was really only one thing to do.
I stood up, patting my leg, "Come on!" Both dogs bounded over to me. Lets go, you'll hang out with me until your owners come.
I called the owners. "Uh, it's me again. They followed me home. Just come to 1215 Glade Street. That way we know they're safe and sound and not running wild. Bye."
Both dogs happily sat at the gate while I put Achilles inside. Then they made themselves at home in the backyard.
The owners came shortly after that. They were very thankful.
I told them it was no problem, I was glad to do it and that I was just happy they came to dog-friendly house.

Hattiesburg Tornado, February 10, 2013

I have lived in many places, being military we moved around a lot. From the summer of 2009 until the summer of 2012 our family lived in Hattiesburg, Mississippi. It's a beautiful town, with southern charm, families that extend back generations. We made a lot friends there, and it was a difficult decision to leave Hattiesburg once my husband retired. We had actually considered staying there, raising our family there, something my Texas husband had never considered doing EVER- so that in itself says something about Hattiesburg.
On 10 February 2013 destruction came to that beautiful, small town in Mississippi in the form of a tornado.
I have heard from several friends. All are okay. Some have house damage, some have vehicle damage. All are in shock.
My friend Susan, who lives there wrote on her on Facebook wall (and I hope she doesn't mind me borrowing this) "The name of the Lord is a strong tower; the righteous man runs into it and is safe. Proverbs 18:10 

After witnessing this storm pass right outside our window the ********** are very thankful for our strong tower, our shelter from the storm. Prayers for all those who were not so fortunate!"

Susan once told me "Lisa, you alway have great come-backs, you always know what to say. I wish I did." She was talking about me and my sarcastic come-backs and zingers. Yet, I would trade those "zingers" for her gift of soothing words of encouragement any day. 

Hattiesburg, I pray for you and everyone that is affected by this storm.

This is why I can't sleep.

Last night I went to bed at a reasonable hour, considering it was a Saturday night and Hannah had a friend staying the night, so three giggling girls swore they were staying up ALL NIGHT LONG. Of course, as soon as I get comfy The Hubs begins to snore. He's tried everything; the strips, the mouth piece, sprays,... the list goes on. Nothing helps.
So I abandoned my bed and headed to The Boy's room. He had asked me earlier "When dad snores can you come crash with me?"
But when I went to his room he wasn't there. Hmmm, he must have gone to Hannah's room. Cool. I get the whole bed to myself! Stretching out, I tried to get comfy, but then my mind started doing what it LOVES to do; Hmmm, I doubt the girls would let him crash out with them. OH MY GOSH, I bet aliens took him. That's it. I know he's not in my bed. And he's not in his bed. And he wouldn't be in KK's bed. So the only reasonable explanation is alien abduction. I mean, what if we all get up in the morning and I stumble into the kitchen for coffee and I'm all "Hey, where's Jon?" and the girls are all, "We don't know" and I'm all "I thought he crashed out with you guys" and they are all "No way, he's a boy!" and I'm all "Holy crap, he's been abducted by aliens!"
So I got out of bed and followed the giggling to Hannah's room, "Hey, is Jon in here?"
"No way!"
I instantly broke out in a cold sweat.
KK pipped up "I know where he is!"
...
...
...
(come on kid, the suspense is killing me!)
...
...
...
(Hello!?!?!)
...
...
...
"Come on momma, follow me." Then she went to the living room and there was The Boy, crashed out on the couch. So I scooped him up and took him back to his room, and snuggled him, because- let's be honest, he was almost abducted by aliens, and I couldn't get the image of him strapped to a cold metal table with a bright light blinding his eyes, or him zooming through space, lightyears away calling for me. Ugh, horrible, just horrible.
Yea, you try sleeping when you have those imaging flashing through your mind of your kiddo.

No I'm not turning into one of those crazy ladies who paints their cat's nails, this was done out of necessity.

Last week we got a leather couch, we have always had fabric couches, and we have never really freaked out when the cats clawed them. Shame on us.
So with the arrival of this nice couch that had to change.
As soon as the couch arrived 'Rabi ran into the living room, a smile literally spreading onto her furry little face, you could just tell she was saying "For me? Really? It's the biggest scratching post I've ever had! Here, let me try it out!"
And she did.
And we freaked.
She looked at us like "What's your deal? You get me this cool scratching post and then expect me not to use it? Pffft!"
So I searched the internet trying to see what we could do, we don't want to declaw the cats.
We came across "Soft Paws". So we tried them out. It took 4 days, 4 DAYS!!!! to get these on 'Rabi. She hates being held to get loved on, forget being held so that you can clip her nails and shove nail covers on claws.
But it was finally done.
Ta-dah!
What do you think:

And yes, she typically lays in chip box. Apparently it's comfy.

Jon's day!!!

Today is The Boy's birthday. He's 9.
We spent the weekend doing stuff he liked doing: Saturday The Hubs took him to Zero Dark Thirty per his request, he loved it. Then yesterday I took him and his sisters to the carnival that was set up in the mall's parking lot here him town. He rode (nearly) every ride, then proceeded to down a footlong corn dog, a funnel cake, a large pop corn, topped off with a large coke. Then said "when are we having lunch?" Huh?
After the carnival we headed to Toys R Us where he drug me down every-single-aisle-in-that-blessed-store-and-then-down-every-aisle-all-over-again before saying "I think I wanna go to Target." Well, why didn't you just say that in the first place.
Target is my favorite place in the whole entire universe.
So that's where we found ourselves, trying on Marvel comic masks while he tried to decide what to buy with his birthday money from his grandparents.
Here are some pics from the shopping trip:

I think the last one is my favorite, the teeth crack me up. That coupled with KK's eyes that say "I hope that a nice stranger comes along and saves me from this torture!" 

Schmuck

I am not posting that much anymore.
I have lots to write about, trust me- it all bombards me about midnight when I lay down.
And I think to myself "I'm totally gonna write about that tomorrow!" Then the next morning I'm like "Hey, I'm gonna play that new Dream Chronicles game I downloaded ALL DAY LONG. Wait, wasn't there something I was gonna do? Doesn't matter!" Then I go to bed and think "Crap, I did it again!"

Oh, well, NEW YEAR!!!! NEW ME!!!

2012 was crazy. We saw lots of changes. Goodbye Army life, hello civilian life. And trust me, it's different. I'm glad we had that last tour at Camp Shelby so it got us used to not depending so much on the military, because once you are out of the military then government acts like you are the step-child that it never liked in the first place.

We have moved to Texas and love that we are close to family again. Calvin has introduced himself to all the neighbors in his usually style, you know- "Hey you, yea you, see all this stuff here? This stuff right here? It was yours? I say WAS, it's mine now. Yea, I know that technically it's your house and all, but I'd appreciate it if you hear me at the door if you'd go ahead and let me in. I like to change things up a bit, sleep over here one night, over there one night. Resistance is futile." The neighbors seem to tolerate him so far.

The kids are doing great. They love have big classrooms WITH SO MANY KIDS IN EACH ROOM!!!! It really was a culture shock for them.

Ok, so now that all that's out of the way go watch THIS and laugh until you cry (you may want to skip until about 1:10 for this real hilarity to begin, but trust me it's worth it!).

Stuff I found while poking around

I don't know whether to be happy for the dog or sad for the squirrel.

I want to like this, but I can't take my eyes off the picture of the HUGE spider. Seriously, why would you have a picture of a spider??? 

I cracked up way too much at this. Ricky Gervais is hilarious. 

I'm going to try this!

Anytime I need cheering up I'm clicking on this. 

I have a mini-anviety attack every time I see this!

I seriously cannot get enough of Tard.

The youngest one.....she scares me.

I'm sitting on the sofa working hard on my computer  playing Dream Chronicles on the computer when little Kimberly comes up and says "Hey, mom, can you open this?" I look up and she is holding up a box that is as tall as she is. I recognize it as her Princess Collection doll set that she got for Christmas, it has yet to be opened.

Worst. Mom. Ever.

So we set out to the task of setting these gals free. KK has been hog wild for Barbies ever since her Aunt Kim gave her a bunch of Barbies and Barbie stuff that her daughter outgrew (thank you Kim! You have kept KK very occupied!).

As we set each Princess free KK would croon over her, making sure her little high heels were set on right, smoothing her gown, then she would sit her on the foot of the bed. There all the Princesses sat, like they were ready for the theater when I collected the box that they came in and told KK to have fun.
"Yes, ma'am, momma, thank you so much! Love you!" Aaahhhh, my sweet little angel. How did I ever get so fortunate? How did I get so blessed?

And then, it happened. It did not sound like the sweet little 6 year old that was just telling me she loved me, instead it sounded like a drill sergeant on day 1 of basic training.
"Listen up, ladies, and listen up good, I'm not going to repeat it. You will not be called a Princess in this house! No you will not! Do you hear me? There is only one Princess in this house, and you're looking at her. Do I make myself clear?"

Yep, there's the KK I know!

I'd like to say things like this is few and far between but then I'd be a liar. Yea.

So, The Hubs and I are sitting in the living room watching some tv last night, the kiddos are behind us coloring and making art on the table. We can clearly see both KK and Jon's bedroom doors from where we sit.
Now let me just say, when we lived in Mississippi we had a real problem with the kids writing on the doors and the walls. I spent a lot of money on Mr Clean Magic Erasers. So when we moved here we sat the kids down and lectured them about how we would beat them be very disappointed if they wrote on anymore walls or doors.
Okay, back to last night. I glanced over to KK's door and there it was: bright pink marker writing on her door- smack, dab in the middle of her door.

Me: Holy mother of all that's pink, look at KK's door.
The Hubs: Huh?
Me: KK's door! She wrote on it!
KK: (running over to her door) No, momma, see! It's on paper! (and with that she magically lifted the pink letters right off the door. Now I could see the bright pink letters were written on white paper that was then placed on a white door. Very tricky on this old lady eyes! The Hubs and I let out a sigh of relief.)
The Hubs: Very good, KK! That is exactly where you write on, paper and not the door! Very, very good! Go ahead and put that back up on your door!

So we watched her smooth the paper back up onto her bedroom door. Hmmmm, that looks odd.

Me: KK, what did you use to make that paper stick to your door?
KK: Glue, duh!

Awesome!

It’s my oldest son’s Birthday today, so I’m celebrating by telling you this story about him!

When Michael was little (around 4) he was playing outside after one of Washington’s notorious rains.  Now when it rained there THOUSANDS of big fat worms would come up out of the ground. They would be everywhere. It was really quite a sight to see.

Michael LOVED these worms. They were his ‘friends’.

So, back to the story: after one of these rains Michael comes back in the house with one of my nice, new Tupperware containers.

Me: Hey, whatcha got there?

Michael: Worms. (Okay, here’s where I’m going to say that even though he knew better than have worms in my bowl, he was also very honest.)

Me: Uh, no. You have to go dump those worms out.

Michael: But they’re my friends.

Me: They can be your friends somewhere other than my bowl. Now outside. (And with that I pointed outside, and that’s where he headed.)

A few minutes later Michael came back inside, headed for the kitchen and put the bowl in the kitchen sink.

Me: Thank you.

Michael: (Mouth closed- just nods)

Me: You okay?

Michael: (Mouth still closed- nods again)

Me: Michael?

Michael: (Looks up at me- mouth still closed)

Me: Hey, did you put the worms outside?

Michael (Mouth STILL closed, shrugs his shoulders)

Me: Michael, where are the worms?

Michael: (Mouth still closed, just looks at me)

Me: Michael, open your mouth.

Michael: - Opens his mouth, and to my horror about twenty big, fat worms are crawling around inside his mouth.

Me: (Shrieking a bit) Outside now, Michael. Go spit them out. Now, now, now.

I pushed walked him outside so he could spit them out. Then I demanded that he go brush his teeth- for a very, very long time.

A little while later he said he was headed back outside to “Play with his friends”.

Me: Okay, but don’t put any more worms in your mouth.

And he didn’t. But the next day when I went to wash clothes I found the pockets of his jeans jam packed with dried up worms. Great. Well, at least he didn’t put them back in his mouth.

Wanna know something great about my oldest son Michael?

He’s grown now, in the Army. And he’s pretty independent. Always has been. When he was little we lived on base at Ft Lewis. Our housing was Evergreen housing, which was right by Madigan gate. Remember that, it’s important to this story, mmmmkay?

Michael had one of those battery-powered cars. He went everywhere on this (well, up and down Acoma Loop, anyways.) He also would recruit all the kids in the neighborhood to help him get it up the slide – one of those extra wide slides that was like 4 feel wide- and then he would go zooming down it. So yea, I was like awesome and all that. I probably have unclaimed “Mother-of-the-Year” awards out there (insert sarcasm here).

Anyhow, he loved this car.

He also LOVED to unlock the door. He could unlock the front door with ease, even at 4 years old. And the chain? Not a problem, he would build a tower of chairs, books, toys (you name it) and climb it so that he could unchain the door. And stealthy, this kid would not make a single noise while constructing elaborate towers. It was really quite amazing.

Now, picture me sleeping soundly, like a NORMAL mother would at midnight. Got a good image of that, okay, now picture me being awaken by very loud knocking on the front door- one might even call it banking.

What the heck? Right?

I open the door to find:

·      2 MPs

·      Michael

·      And his car

You get the picture? Good. You guessed it; he decided to go for a little midnight drive. Wanna know where he was headed? Out Madigan gate. Maybe he wanted a some Taco Bell, who knows.

In the end I wasn’t reported, his father was an MP there on Ft Lewis, and I had been an MP there. So we knew everyone. But still it was talk of post for a while. And the car? No, I didn’t pull the plug on it, but I did secure it in our garage every single night- and by secure I mean LOCK IT UP.

(The face of trouble right here, folks- back in the day)

(Also, he's awesome!)